Haiku Process

Hello and goodbye

The last words of my father

Hid his broken heart

This recent obsession with haiku is related to two things now going on in my life:  (1) there are hours during the night when I cannot sleep and making up haiku fills the time, and (2) I am trying in my painting to define as little as possible and still convey what I mean (see my art blog, judytoddart.blogspot.com). In haiku, you are limited to 17 syllables with which to convey your thoughts and emotions, so every little bit has to count. 

The haiku above is based on the fact that my father actually said, “Hello. Goodbye.” and that was all, on the phone to me, the day he collapsed and became brain dead (he officially died a few days later). He had experienced many disappointments and defeats in his life and one big tragedy when his parents were killed. Yet, like most men in those days, he revealed very little of himself to anyone. He drowned his secrets in alcohol, or perhaps he self-medicated his sadness with alcohol. At any rate, I was trying to convey how he spoke to me, but didn’t really tell me anything, on the day he died, as always.

Did I convey this?

Here are other last lines I considered:

The rest is silence

The rest was silence

All ways unrevealed

His path unrevealed

His pain unrevealed

As usual, I am impressed with how one little word can change the feeling and meaning of the whole, just as one little shape can change an entire painting.